Ah summer, a time to sit back and relax, have a few cold ones and for the more sports inclined folks in this city join a sports league or two and get your exercise while being in a social environment as well. Ok, that may not be for all of us. While there are many of my fellow Cambridge citizens participating in the rigorous sports out there like baseball and football, heck I even consider Golf a little too strenuous for me, there are many in my age group that look for other options to get involved in sports that allow us to drink beer and socialize away from our wives and the many chores that they have lined up for us during these warm months. With that in mind I have created a new Sports League for those that are of a like mind, it is for the terminally lazy and the genetically inherited clumsy residents of Cambridge, and we don’t need to drive to Doon to participate in any of the sports. It is a league that involves very little running or physical activity and it will get us off the front porches and away from grass cutting to compete on a face to face basis with our peers.
Some of the activities that I have come up with include:
…Full Contact Twister– a game that involves 2 teams of 4 players each, We hope to get about 12 teams for this one.
…Window Shopping tag–The Cambridge center will be the host for this one, Good Lord, we already have 18 woman sign up for this event, should be one of the greatest events in this city’s history.
…Cookie Baking–This league is not as easy as it sounds, each week the cookie to be made will not be known to the contestants until 2 hours before the contest and they will have to run out and get all the ingredients for it.– But in the end the reward for all the teams in this one is they get to eat the finished product.
…Extreme Ironing–Each week the contestants will have only one hour to Iron clothes that are choosing by the Mayor, The members of city Council have already volunteered to help with this one”
…Stone Skimming–Shades Mill will be the host for this traditional summer event. There isn’t anyone in this city that has not skimmed a stone at one time or another
…Ultimate Fly swatting–‘The contestants in this league will really work up a sweat, and the team that wins this league gets a golden fly swatter as a trophy, This is truly a Canadian event.
…Monday Night Euchre: Watch the old gals try to deke around a bad hand and score points.
…Soper Park Toe Wrestling: Competing teams from the East Side and the West Side of Galt go toe to toe in top-notch toe wrestling live from Soper Park.
That is my list for now, and I hope that these events will get us all off our fannies and onto the path to well-being, or a path to a local bar….