Monthly Archives: June 2010

What i Learned from my Dad


Our Mothers teach us things but we learn valuable life lessons from our Fathers. My dad was no exception, as i learned some things from him that my Mother could never have taught me.
Don’t watch the Clock at work, the end of the day will come soon enough. I learned from him that fish can see you if you lean over the boat and that they can hear you if you talk too loud. I learned that which does not kill you will hurt you like the dickens. Oh yeah, i learned the word dickens from him as well. I learned that objects in the mirror are really closer than they appear and not to test the theory while he was in the car. Time travel was learned from him” If you don’t smarten up i will knock you into next week”. I learned to travel the back roads as often as possible and also where the good spots were to have a pee break. I also learned to question authority[unless it was him]. I learned that i wasn’t born in a barn and that he had to walk 5 miles to school.uphill, both ways. I learned that “because i said so” makes sense to adults and that i would lose my head if it wasn’t screwed on. I learned that Tabasco sauce and Limburger cheese won’t kill you. I learned that i am lucky to have Parents and an extended family that really care.
Oh and i also learned one important thing…..FLATULANCE, and how to use it.

The Chase


One thing about my family is that you come to expect the unexpected. And when you throw a Nun,my Dad, a couple of shots of brandy and the Jehovah Witness,you wind up with an interesting afternoon. Such an occurrence happened and thank the lord i was there to witness it.
The year is hazy but i was still in high school so i guess it would have been around 1972 or 1973. My mother’s sister was in fact a sister. Aunt Grace to us but Sister Francis Regis to the rest of the world. She always loved to come home to Cooper Street and sit out on the back patio talking to my mom and dad and enjoying the family life. This day she and my dad had opened the brandy and had a couple of shots when the doorbell rang and my Dad got up to answer it, when he came back he told Aunt grace that there were two Jehovah Witness’s at the door and he had told them that there was someone who wanted to talk to them and they waiting patiently at the front door for her. Now in those day’s the Nun’s still wore all the habits and as luck would have it my Aunt’s was on the chair beside her and she gladly threw them on and went to the door. but what happened after that is why this story sticks in my mind. Walking briskly up cooper Street were 2 Jehovah Witness’s being pursued by a Catholic Nun in all her glory yelling “come back, we have a lot to talk about”, never had i been more amused at something my family had pulled off and i swear my Dad almost split a gut laughing so hard heck even my Aunt and my mom could hardly stop laughing. Ah Summer, memory’s are made of this. Aunt Grace is no longer with us but everytime i think of her i have to smile. I mean how could a little lady like this scare two grown men, really?